I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize