Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
