Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
no you cant smoke seaweed
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
