So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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