So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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