In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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