saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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