STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
tell me about the eggs
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize