We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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