Are we in a gay sports bar?
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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