guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize