on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
All the doctor said was why
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
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