this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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