Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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