I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
