he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
It's blow job season.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
