I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
