what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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