dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
