im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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