My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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