Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
