I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
