it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
