Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
