I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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