Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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