Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
