I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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