do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
