i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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