Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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