The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
