imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
