She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I smell like Dick and happiness
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
