Can Purell be used as lube?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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