I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
