White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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