i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
