that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
