I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
