Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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