At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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