just come out here and I will go home with you...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
