i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
