Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
