i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
