i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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