I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
