Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize